Quote Friday

Reposting this from the archives for Quote Friday. Enjoy!

From Groucho

Groucho Marx:

"Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped."

"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."

"From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend to read it."

"Go, and never darken my towels again."

"I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book."

"I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception."

"I sent the club a wire stating, PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT ME AS A MEMBER."

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it."

"Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others."

"Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana."

Margaret Dumont: "Why, that reminds me of my youth!!"
Groucho: "He must be a pretty big boy by now."

A Day at the Races:

Man: "Are you a man or a mouse?"
Groucho: "Put a piece of cheese on the floor and you'll find out."

"And stop pointing that beard at me, it might go off!"

A Night at the Opera:

Lassparri: "They threw an apple at me!"
Groucho: "Well, watermelons are out of season."

A Night in Casablanca:

"We've got to speed things up in this hotel. Chef, if a guest orders a three-minute egg, give it to him in two minutes. If he orders a two-minute egg, give it to him in one minute. If he orders a one-minute egg, give him a chicken and let him work it out for himself."

Groucho: "You know I think you're the most beautiful woman in the world?"
Woman: "Really?"
Groucho: "No, but I don't mind lying if it gets me somewhere."

Animal Crackers:

"We must remember that art is art. Well, on the other hand water is water isn't it? And east is east and west is west. And if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rubarb does."

"Do you mind if I don't smoke?"

"I'm Captain Scotland of the Spalding Yard...Captain Yard of the Scotland Spalding"

Horse Feathers:

"Members of the faculty, faculty members. Students of Huxley and Huxley's students. Well I guess that covers everything"

"Why don't you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?"

"Have we got a college? Have we got a football team?....Well we can't afford both. Tomorrow we start tearing down the college."

Quote Friday - Brideshead Revisited

This is a scene from Evelyn Waugh's book, Brideshead Revisited. Charles Ryder visits his friend, Sebastian Flyte, at Sebastian's home, Brideshead, during their summer break at the end of their first year at Oxford.

"One day we went down to the cellars with Wilcox and saw the empty bays which had once held a vast store of wine; one transept only was used now; there the bins were well stocked some of them with vintages fifty years old.

'There's been nothing added since his Lordship went abroad,' said Wilcox. 'A lot of the old wine wants drinking up. We ought to have laid down the eighteens and twenties. I've had several letters about it from the wine merchants, but her Ladyship says to ask Lord Brideshead, and he says to ask the lawyers. That's how we get low. There's enough here for ten years at the rate it's going, but how shall we be then?'

Wilcox welcomed our interest; we had bottles brought up from every bin, and it was during those tranquil evenings with Sebastian that I first made a serious acquaintance with wine and sowed the seed of a rich harvest which was to be my stay in many barren years. We would sit, he and I, in the Painted Parlour with three bottles open on the table and three glasses before each of us; Sebastian had found a book on wine-tasting, and we followed its instructions in detail. We warmed the glass slightly at a candle, filled it a third high, swirled the wine round, nursed it in our hands, held it to the light, breathed it, sipped it, filled our mouths with it, and rolled it over the tongue, ringing it on the palate like a coin on a counter, tilted our heads back and let it trickle down the throat. Then we talked of it and nibbled Bath Oliver biscuits, and passed on to another wine; then back to the first then on to another, until all three were in circulation and the order of the glasses got confused, and we fell out over which was which, and passed the glasses to and fro between us until there were six glasses, some of them with mixed wines in them which we had filled from the wrong bottle, till we were obliged to start again with three clean glasses each, and the bottles were empty and our praise of them wilder and more exotic.
'...It is a little, shy wine like a gazelle.'
'Like a leprechaun.'
'Dappled, in a tapestry meadow.'
'Like a flute by still water.'
'...And this is a wise old wine.'
'A prophet in a cave.'
'...And this is a necklace of pearls on a white neck.'
'Like a swan.'
'Like the last unicorn.'

And we would leave the golden candlelight of the dining-room for the starlight outside and sit on the edge of the fountain, cooling our hands in the water and listening drunkenly to its splash and gurgle over the rocks.
'Ought we to be drunk every night?' Sebastian asked one morning.
'Yes, I think so.'
'I think so too.'"

Quote Friday

"But you, Kristin, you should have seen so much now, methinks, that you might trust in God Almighty with a surer trust. Have you not yet understood that He bears up every soul so long as the soul lets not go its hold on Him? Think you, woman, child that you still are in your old age, that 'tis God punishing the sin, when you reap sorrow and humiliation because you followed your lusts and your own overweening pride over paths that God has forbidden His children to tread? Would you say that you had punished your children if they scalded their hands when they took up the boiling kettle you had forbidden them to touch, or if the slippery ice broke under them that you had warned them not to go upon? Have you not understood, when the brittle ice broke beneath you - that you were drawn under each time you let go God's hand, that you were saved from out of the deep each time you called upon Him?...Have you not understood yet, sister, that God has helped you each time you prayed, though you prayed half-heartedly and with feigning, and helped you much beyond what you prayed for? You loved God as you loved your father, not so hotly as you loved your own will, yet none the less so that you ever sorrowed much when you forsook Him - and therefore His mercy toward you suffered good to grow, admidst the evil harvest you must needs reap from the seed of your stubborn will."

Kristin Lavransdatter (The Cross) by Sigrid Undset

library art

On a quest to find the perfect artwork for my children's school library (small classical school and tiny library), I came across several zingers. This one is probably my favorite because despite my best efforts I still have a crush on Shakespeare.

And isn't this just so incredibly fun?! And I think, "I could make that!...but not right now."

 

I can't amen this enough!

That John Keats was a true genius. I tell ya.

The next one brings my high school history teacher to mind because he always said it, and all that knew him knew he felt this way in his heart of hearts.

The next one is so true. Some of my very favorite people are dead. Wait...was that socially awkward?

 

Wish I could beat this into the young school children's heads.

But this is the one I ended up going with because it's just so fun, it's not just a quote but a colorful illustration too, it sort of reminds me of our house, and I found it for sale at a reasonable price. Unfortunately, I had to take the latter into consideration.

Books to the ceiling, Books to the sky, My pile of books is a mile high. How I love them! How I need them! I'll have a long beard by the time I read them. 
~ Arnold Lobel

My thoughts exactly, Mr Lobel... well, except for the bit about the beard.

quotes from 'Jill the Reckless'

'Barker!' His voice had a ring of pain.
'Sir?'
'What's this?'
'Poached egg, sir.'
Freddie averted his eyes with a silent shudder.
'It looks just like an old aunt of mine,' he said. 'Remove it.'


This woman always made Freddie feel as if he were being disemboweled by some clumsy amateur.


...the little dinner at Freddie Rooke's had not been an unqualified success. Searching the records for an adequately gloomy parallel to the taxi-cab journey to the theatre which followed it, one can only think of Napoleon's retreat from Moscow. And yet even that was probably not conducted in dead silence.


If there is one thing that startles a well-bred Londoner and throws him off his balance, it it to be addressed unexpectedly by a stranger. Freddie's sense of decency was revolted. A voice from the tomb could hardly have shaken him more.


There are men who fear the repartee of a wife more keenly than a sword. Derek was one of these. Like most men of single outlook, whose dignity is their most precious possession, he winced from an edged tongue....She did not speak the words. If she had an edged tongue, she had also the control of it.


Lady Underhill, having said all she had to say, recovered her breath and begin to say it again. Frequent iteration was one of her strongest weapons.


He was fond of children, but they made the deuce of a noise and regarded jam as an external ornament.


No wonder Freddie experienced the sort of abysmal soul-sadness which afflicts one of Tolstoi's Russian peasants when, after putting in a heavy day's work strangling his father, beating his wife, and dropping the baby into the city reservoir, he turns to the cupboard, only to find the vodka-bottle empty.


He was a snub-nosed boy. His ears and hair were vermilion. His name was Ralph. He has seven hundred and forty-three pimples.


He stared again at Jill. The inspection was long and lingering and affected Jill with a sense of being inadequately clothed. She returned the gaze as defiantly as she could, but her heart was beating fast. She had never yet been frightened of any man, but there was something reptilian about this fat, yellow-haired individual which disquieted her, much as cockroaches had done in her childhood. A momentary thought flashed through her mind that it would be horrible to be touched by him. He looked soft and glutinous.


'Don't you worry, honey!' advised the well-meaning girl who would have been in her element looking in on Job with Bildad the Shuhite and his friends. 'Don't you worry!'


'I say,' said Freddie in an awed voice. 'He's a bit of a nut, that lad, what? He reminds me of the troops of Midian in the hymn. The chappies who prowled and prowled around. I'll bet he's worn a groove in the carpet like a jolly old tiger at the Zoo at feeding time. Wouldn't be surprised at any moment to look down and find him biting a piece out of my leg!'

Sticks in my craw... (Boss)

Okay, so I'll admit it. I love westerns. On our last anniversary I asked my husband to take me to see True Grit starring Jeff Bridges (which I loved) if that tells you anything. Watching Open Range again I realized how many memorable quotes there are in this movie. Here are some of my favorites.

Boss Spearman: A mans trust is a valuable thing, Button. You don't want to lose it for a handful of cards.

Charley Waite: Tell you the truth, Lord, if there was two gentler souls in this world, I never seen 'em. Seems like old Tig wouldn't even kill birds in the end. Well, you got yourself a good man and a good dog, and I'm inclined to agree with Boss here about holding a grudge against you for it. I guess that means Amen."

Sheriff Poole: I've got a warrant sworn out for your arrest, for assaulting Baxter's men.
Boss Spearman: We got a warrant sworn out for attempted murder of them who tried to kill the boy, who's layin' over there at the doc's tryin' to stay alive. Sworn out another one for them that murdered the big fella you had in your cell. Only ours ain't writ by no tin star bought and paid for, Marshal. It's writ by us, and we aim to enforce it.

[Charley has explained his strategy for the upcoming fight] 
Boss Spearman: Sounds like you got it all worked out.
Charley Waite: Yeah, except the part where we don't get killed.

Boss Spearman: I ain't gonna let you do it, Charley. You do this, you ain't no different than Poole or Baxter or that gunhand of his that murdered Mose.
Charley Waite: Him killing Mose is how this started.
Boss Spearman: We come for justice, not vengeance. Now them is two different things.
Charley Waite: Not today, they ain't.
Boss Spearman: Step aside!

Mack: Shame what this towns come to.
Charley Waite: You could do something about it.
Mack: What? We're freighters. Ralph here's a shopkeeper.
Charley Waite: You're men, ain't you?
Mack: I didn't raise my boys just to see em killed.
Charley Waite: Well you may not know this, but there's things that gnaw at a man worse than dying.

Boss Spearman: I believe you have a friend of ours in your jail. His names Mose Harrison.
Sheriff Poole: Yeah, I got him here. He started a fight in the general store.
Boss Spearman: Mose don't start fights. He just finishes them.

Boss Spearman: It ain't right to walk away without a word.
Charley Waite: Well what do you want me to tell her, Boss? We probably ain't gonna make it? Be a big fat comfort.

Doc Barlow: I'd say 'to good health,' gentlemen, but then I'd probably be out of business, wouldn't I?
Boss Spearman: We'll drink to good health for them that have it coming.

Mingle or I'll mangle. ~Moe to Larry and Curly

Audrey Hepburn

Audrey Hepburn said that her father leaving "left me insecure for life perhaps. I do think there are things, experiences in childhood, that form you for the rest of your life." Her father was a nazi-sympathizer and her mother took her to the Netherlands to wait out World War II. Shortly after their move, the nazis came to the Netherlands. Audrey said, "Had we known we were going to be occupied for five years, we might have all shot ourselves. We thought it would be over next week...six months...next year...That's how we got through."

In 1991, Audrey said "I have memories. More than once I was at the station seeing trainloads of Jews being transported, seeing all these faces over the top of the wagon. I remember, very sharply, one little boy standing with his parents on the platform, very pale, very blond, wearing a coat that was much too big for him, and he stepped on to the train. I was a child observing a child".

Audrey's slight figure can be attributed to not getting near enough to eat during the years of German occupation. She said that the War "made me resilient and terribly appreciative for everything good that came afterward. I felt enormous respect for food, freedom, for good health, and family- for human life." She recalls, "We talked about food endlessly- what meal we would eat when the war was over. I think mine was chocolate cake...Let's face it, a nice creamy chocolate cake does a lot for a lot of people; it does for me."

She felt that she was fortunate, "How shall I sum up my life? I think I've been particularly lucky. Does that have something to do with faith also? I know my mother always used to say, 'Good things aren't supposed to just fall in your lap. God is very generous, but he expects you to do your part first.' So you have to make that effort. But at the end of a bad time or a huge effort, I've always had - how shall I say it? - the prize at the end. My whole life shows that."

Her mother taught her to put others before herself. "It's that wonderful old-fashioned idea that others come first and you come second. This was the whole ethic by which I was brought up. Others matter more than you do, so don't fuss, dear; get on with it." Audrey says her mother was "a fabulous mother but not an affectionate person... There were times when I though she was cold- but she loved me in her heart, and I knew that all along." Audry remembers, "As a child, I was taught that it was bad manners to bring attention to yourself, and to never, ever make a spectacle of yourself... All of which I've earned a living doing."

Audrey said becoming an actress "just happened; I had no intention of it." She said, "I needed the money; it paid ₤3 more than ballet jobs". Audrey recalls, "I never expected to be a star, never counted on it, never even wanted it. Not that I didn't enjoy it all when it happened. (But) it's not as if I were a great actress. I'm not Bergman. I don't regret for minute making the decision to quit movies for my children."

She seemed to have a balanced view of life, "There is a Dutch saying, 'Don't fret; it will happen differently anyway.' I believe that." In her life she says, "I didn't expect anything much and because of that I'm the least bitter woman I know." She believed, "It would be terribly sad, wouldn't it, to look back on your life in films and not know your children? For me there's nothing more pleasant or exciting or lovely or rewarding than seeing my children grow up...and they only grow up once, remember.

Here are a few more quotes from this lovely woman.

"I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it's the thing I like most, to laugh. It cures a multitude of ills. It's probably the most important thing in a person."

"People seem to have this fixed image of me. In a way I think it's very sweet, but it's also a little sad. After all, I'm a human being. When I get angry, I sometimes swear."

"I'm not a city person...I'm very board by cement."

"I adore cooking and love to garden. Dull, isn't it?"

"I think any woman dresses mostly for the man in her life."

"You have to be relaxed as possible about food and fitness and the rest of it, or you'll be a slave to your beauty habits...You may have great skin, but you become a robot."
"My look is attainable. Women can look like Audrey Hepburn by flipping out their hair, buying the large sunglasses, and the little sleeveless dresses."

"I don't want to be a perennial teenager."

"There's never any need for any woman to ogle any man. Ogling only puts the men off...In fact, the faintest flutter of an eyelash should be enough."

"Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, it's at the end of your arm, as you get older, remember you have another hand: The first is to help yourself, the second is to help others."

"When you have nobody you can make a cup of tea for, when nobody needs you, that's when I think life is over."

"Living is like tearing through a museum. Not until later do you really start absorbing what you saw, thinking about it, looking it up in a book, and remembering - because you can't take it in all at once."

JA quote contest at an end

The JA quote contest is at an end. The answers are as follows,

1) "Where people wish to attach, they should always be ignorant. To come with a well-informed mind is to come with an inability of administering to the vanity of others, which a sensible person would always wish to avoid. A woman, especially, if she have the misfortune of knowing anything, should conceal it as well as she can." ~Northanger Abby This is Jane Austen's teasing voice (or is it Henry Tilney's?) in reference to Catherine attracting Henry.

2) "...for he was in the room again, and though feeling it would be a great honour to be asked by him, she thought it must happen. He came towards their little circle; but instead of asking her to dance, drew a chair near her, and gave her an account of the present state of a sick horse, and the opinion of the groom, from whom he had just parted." ~ Mansfield Park Grace was correct. This is between Fanny and her cousin Tom.

3) "...and be the conclusion of the present suspense good or bad, her affection would be his forever. Their union, she believed, could not divide her more from other men than their final separation." ~Persuasion These are Anne's thoughts on marriage to Wentworth.

4) " ...the perturbation of her feelings was every moment increasing. She was quite amazed at her own discomposure...and more than commonly anxious to please, she naturally suspected that every power of pleasing would fail her. She retreated from the window, fearful of being seen; and as she walked up and down the room, endeavouring to compose herself, saw such looks of inquiring surprise from her friends, as made everything worse." ~Pride & Prejudice This is Elizabeth when she hears that Darcy is coming to pay her a call.

Therefore, the winner is...SARAH! I am impressed with the bravery of all of you in competing against Sarah on this one. I really, really am. You all showed that you would not be daunted by a crazy JA fan. I really can't applaud you enough. And you never know, maybe next time she will be too busy to speed read the completed works.

Ruth, you got 3 out of 4. Way to go! Bess, you guessed all of the right titles (your ordering was just a bit off). Thanks all for playing. It was quite a diverting amusement.

Sarah's prize is a Wodehouse book called, Full Moon. I have been in the mood to read little else besides ol' Plum lately. I hope you enjoy it (apologies for the front cover being worn). The description on the back of the book reads, "As the full moon waxes over Blandings Castle, young love flounders in the Ninth Earl of Emsworth's shrubbery, and Landseer is commissioned to paint the prize pig's portrait." (Oh yeah, this is going to be good.)


Note: Images used are from sarahemsley.com
(Sarah Emsley, "The Jane Austen Playgroup")

JA quote contest

Those of you who have not been able to make it to the customary dog races may be feeling the need to bet your shirt on something. Here is your chance. Below are 4 quotes from 4 of the 6 novels of Jane Austen. They are numbered for your voting convenience. Simply tell us which quote is from which book. (You may thumb through her books if you think it might help.)




1) "Where people wish to attach, they should always be ignorant. To come with a well-informed mind is to come with an inability of administering to the vanity of others, which a sensible person would always wish to avoid. A woman, especially, if she have the misfortune of knowing anything, should conceal it as well as she can."

2) "...for he was in the room again, and though feeling it would be a great honour to be asked by him, she thought it must happen. He came towards their little circle; but instead of asking her to dance, drew a chair near her, and gave her an account of the present state of a sick horse, and the opinion of the groom, from whom he had just parted."

3) "...and be the conclusion of the present suspense good or bad, her affection would be his forever. Their union, she believed, could not divide her more from other men than their final separation."

4) " ...the perturbation of her feelings was every moment increasing. She was quite amazed at her own discomposure...and more than commonly anxious to please, she naturally suspected that every power of pleasing would fail her. She retreated from the window, fearful of being seen; and as she walked up and down the room, endeavouring to compose herself, saw such looks of inquiring surprise from her friends, as made everything worse."

Life is pretty easy
When it's from my easy-chair
~Goo Goo Dolls

JA laughing

Katy's Jane Austen quotes have inspired me to post some of my favorites taken from JA's letters. In his essay, Jane Austen and Pride and Prejudice, W. Somerset Maugham said, "Jane Austen hardly ever wrote a letter that had not a smile or a laugh in it."

"Only think of Mrs. Holder being dead! Poor woman, she has done the only thing in the world she could possibly do to make one cease to abuse her."

"Mrs. Hall, of Sherborne, was brought to bed yesterday of a dead child, some weeks before she expected, owing to a fright. I suppose she happened unawares to look at her husband."

"The death of Mrs. W.K. we had seen. I had no idea that anybody liked her, and therefore felt nothing for any survivor, but I am now feeling away on her husband's account, and think he had better marry Miss Sharpe."

"I respect Mrs. Chamberlayne for doing her hair well, but cannot feel a more tender sentiment. Miss Langley is like any other short girl with a broad nose and wide mouth, fashionable dress and exposed bosom. Admiral Stanhope is a gentlemanlike man, but then his legs are too short and his tail too long."

"There were few beauties, (at the ball) and such as there were, were not very handsome. Miss Iremonger did not look well and Mrs. Blunt was the only one much admired. She appeared exactly as she did in September, with the same broad face, diamond bandeau, white shoes, pink husband, and fat neck."

"Mrs. Richard Harvey is going to be married, but as it is a great secret, and only known to half the neighborhood, you must not mention it."

"Dr. Hall is in such deep mourning that either his mother, his wife, or himself must be dead."

"Wednesday. Another stupid party last night; perhaps if larger they might be less intolerable, but here there were only just enough to make one card table,with six people to look on and talk nonsense to each other..."

"There were two women (at the ball) standing without partners and each of them with two ugly naked shoulders!"

"We found only Mrs. Lance at home, and whether she boasts of any offspring besides a grand pianoforte did not appear...They live in a handsome style and are rich, and she seems to like to be rich; we gave her to understand that we were far from being so; she will soon feel therefore that we are not worth her acquaintance."

Her family, when comparing Jane to her sister, Cassandra, said that Cassandra had the merit of always having her temper under command, but Jane had the happiness of a temper that never required to be commanded.

There have been some complaints among readers of her letters that there wasn't more seriousness or more of the "Jane Austen, authoress" that we have come to admire. That she seemed unfeeling towards others or that she just spoke of things that we may find trivial.
In his essay, Jane Austen and Pride and Prejudice, W. Somerset Maugham says,

They (JA's letters) are very natural. Jane Austen never imagined that anyone but Cassandra would read them, and she told her exactly the sort of things she knew would interest her. She told her what people were wearing and how much she had paid for the flowered muslin she had bought, what acquaintances she had made, what old friends she had met and the gossip she had heard...People were more patient in those days; still one would've thought it a disappointment to receive a letter from a friend who gave you word pictures of mountains and monuments when you wanted to know whether he had come across anyone interesting, what parties he had been to and whether he had been able to get you the books or ties or handkerchiefs you had asked him to bring back.